Don't Be Beastly to the British circa 1956

words and music by Tony Gambrill and Ken Lamb

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
They have their troubles you can see;
What with Nasser and Bulganin
And they have another man in
Place of poor old Anthony E.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
There'll always be an England while there's cricket;
Don't remind them of the Mau Mau
Cos they're in the Cyprus row now
And they hope sometime in '59 to lick it.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
They have no petrol for their motor cars;
And Liberace and Monroe
Were in London for a show
Cos Hollywood has all their movie stars.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
Revolution's rife in Singapore;
The natives are demonic
In demanding gin and tonic
Where whiskey and soda did before.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
Aneurin Bevan's up to his old tricks;
The Irish are revolting
And the lion's mane is moulting
While Winnie Churchill goes on laying bricks.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
They're not too sure about their monarchy;
It was peachy at the altar
But the Duke went to Gibraltar
And the Yankee papers shouted "anarchy".

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
There's thirty thousand of them coming here;
And when its 45 below
And we have 10 feet of snow
They'll just have another crumpet with their beer.

Oh, don't be beastly to the British,
A stiff upper lip with see them through;
Billy Grahame will excite them
And eventually invite them
To praise the Lord and praise the dollar too.